A LITTLE FAQ ABOUT HUGO:
Q: So who is this
A: Hugo was Ken's college roommate for two years.
Q: Um, who the hell
A: Ken is NA!P staff even though he's hardly
done crap for several years. Now stick to the
Q: Okay, but who are the John and Dave who
also appear in the Hugo stories?
A: They were also Ken and Hugo's roommates,
and John and Dave contributed a lot of the Hugo
material that you read on NA!P.
Q: How did Ken come to room with Hugo?
A: Hugo and John had been random suite-mates
the year before Ken joined them at college. During
Ken's first year at UNC, John was Ken's roommate,
and Hugo lived down the hall. The following year,
the three moved in together, and Dave joined them
the following year.
Q: Is Hugo real?
A: Yes, Hugo is real.
Q: Are the Hugo
A: Yes, the stories are true. Some of the
unimportant details may have changed a bit with
the retellings over the years, but the heart of each
story is true. Sad to say.
Q: Why is Hugo so
A: If we knew that, we'd probably all be wealthy
psychiatrists or something.
Q: Does Ken still
keep in touch with Hugo?
A: Yes, Ken talks to him about once a year or so.
Q: Does Hugo know about
the web page?
A: Hugo has never been much of an internet or
email user, so it is doubtful he knows about it. Even
so, there is nothing in the Hugo stories that Hugo
hasn't heard told and retold in front of him again
Q: What was it like
living with Hugo for
A: Ken's therapist says that he shouldn't talk
Q: Is Hugo single?
A: Sorry, ladies. Hugo is a married man now.
Q: You mean someone
would actually marry
this incarnation of George Constanza?
A: Yes, and he appears to be happily married. At
least, that's what he tells Ken. His wife does not
speak English, so Ken had to rely on Hugo to
"translate." For all Ken knows, Hugo's wife may
have been saying, "Help me, please. He's holding
me against my will."